Wander-fully Lost: 5 Signs It's Time to Change Your Latitude and Your Attitude

Let's be real, not all vacations are created equal, mostly because the version of you that leaves the house isn't always the version of you that needs to come back. Just this year, I found myself in two drastically different vacation universes. One week, I was navigating a fast-paced and short California adventure with my almost 13 year old daughter - which involved lots of pool time, a variety of activities to keep her attention, and other memorable experiences. Another week, I was in a secluded treehouse in Maine with my husband enjoying a relaxing and beautiful fall trip where the loudest sound was the occasional knocking of a nearby woodpecker. Shockingly, I equally enjoyed them both. Vacation is meant to not only give you an opportunity to see and do something different, but it's also meant to fill up your cup with something you are craving.

Here are five undeniable signs your restless compass is screaming for a total change of pace:

You're Experiencing Default Parent Burnout

The Vibe: If you're a parent or caregiver, it doesn't matter if you are doing it alone or have help - everyone needs a break. For example, I have a very involved ex-husband who has 50% custody of our children. I also have a very supportive husband. I have plenty of help and I am not insinuating that I am the favorite parent. However, sometimes, things have a way of piling up and becoming overwhelming.

Picture this, it's Sunday evening, you are in the middle of making dinner when your children walk in the room. One says "oh, you're making that? I don't like that anymore." The other one says "oh, I forgot to tell you that I picked up a shift at work so I'm not eating dinner here." Later the same night, you are told that a project is due tomorrow and supplies are needed. Everything in town is closed so you need to drive 20 minutes to get to Walmart. When you get home, your older child greets you by asking "did you get me more shampoo when you were at Walmart?" As if you had psychic powers and knew that the shampoo in his bathroom had run out. The next day, it's a mad dash to get the kids out the door. Once the first one leaves and makes it on to the bus, you realize the medication she was supposed to take is still on the counter - so off to school you go before you have to log on for work. You spend the day working from home, trying not to be distracted by the fact that your dog has managed to eat 1/4 of a washcloth and your cat has just produced a giant hairball by your feet. The kids come home from school while you are on an important video call and just hover in the background ignoring your waving at them to leave you alone. You soon start getting text messages from the same children. When you do not respond in 5 minutes, you get a phone call (again, from the children) asking if you can figure out why Roblox "isn't working." Pair this with all the responsibilities and activities that come with maintaining a house, paying bills, bringing kids to activities and milestone events. It's a lot!

The Pivot: If this sounds all too familiar, it may be time to put yourself in a timeout - away from the house. Taking time for yourself is not selfish and it doesn't make you a bad parent. We all need to recharge our batteries sometimes. Think about what is most likely to make you come back feeling renewed and ready to jump back in to the beautiful chaos head first. This does not need to be a long vacation. Even just 24 hours away can make a huge difference. What fills your tank? If you love being surrounded by nature, you could camp, glamp, find a cozy resort, or just spend a day at a state park. Do you love wandering around checking out small towns, drinking coffee, reading books? Check out a quaint bed and breakfast or boutique hotel in a historic small town. Do you want to be pampered? Book a day spa appointment. There is no real rule book here. The only objective is to be responsible for no one but yourself for a period of time and that you fill that time doing something that you love.

Your Relationship Feels Like Perpetual Logistics Project

The Vibe: Here at our house, I have two teenage children and a part-time, newly adult step-son. We have shared calendars to keep track of all the appointments, activities, events, work schedules, etc. When we are not actively talking about the schedules or running kids to the actual events, we are talking about how the events went, what worked and what didn't. Then there's meal planning, visiting family & friends, adult work schedules - the list is endless.

The Pivot: If you can get through the actual trip planning (I know, more time consuming logistical hurdles), you and your partner can take the perfect get away where the only schedule you manager is the one you both agree to ahead of time. It can be as busy or relaxed as you want it to be. The main consideration here is not what you do or where you go, it's how you spend your time as a couple. My husband did a wonderful job on our last vacation setting up some very simple "ground rules." We were leaving in the middle of some stressful changes going on at my work. He knew I had to stay slightly connected just so I wasn't surprised and out of the loop completely when I got back. But he also wanted to make sure we were fully taking advantage of our time together. If something catastrophic happened at work or with the kids while we were gone, that was one thing I should of course deal with and he would fully support me. Outside of that, though, he asked that instead of focusing most of our time on things at home that are stressful and out of our control, to be intentional about being in the moment and enjoying each other. We had various itineraries planned out ahead of time that we could choose from in the moment and then just went with the flow. No planning, minimal logistics, no stress.

You Miss Laughing Until Your Face Hurts

The Vibe: I have the privilege of having a handful of friends who instantly lift me up just by being around them. The problem is that the closest one is about 2 hours away and the rest live outside the state. We all have families, jobs, and other obligations. Getting together for regular dinners or quick, impromptu get togethers are simply not possible. However, whenever we are able to get together, we pick up exactly where we left off. We talk far too much, forget that we are in our 40's, laugh until tears stream and our stomachs hurt. If you are craving that familiar, nonjudgemental, and ridiculous feeling you get with your bestie, then that's your sign it's time to plan something.

The Pivot: As with everything else, you do not have to have unlimited time or funds to pull this off. There are often travel deals during the off season where you can travel for a weekend at a reasonable price. Even if you are just passing through their area, extend your time by a few hours so you can do a little day excursion wherever you are. Go to a karaoke bar, relive your childhood/young adulthood and visit the bowling alley, go get tattoos, go to a concert or sporting event, go to a casino or comedy club. If you really are traveling, go somewhere you both are interested in. Huge music fan? Visit Nashville during the off season for very reasonable prices. Enjoy gambling, clubbing, and hanging by a pool? Go to Vegas! Want to just relax, soak up the sun and not have to think about anything? Find deals on a 3-4 day cruise!

Groundhog Day Has Officially Set In

The Vibe: You wake up, feed and let out the dogs, feed the cat, make sure the kids are up and getting ready for school, get yourself ready for work, work for 8+ hours, take care of dinner, be a chauffeur for your children, help with homework, figure out plans for the next day, go to bed and then do it all over again tomorrow.

The Pivot: Bring the whole family on a vacation - force yourselves out of the routine! Depending on the ages of your children, get them involved in some of the planning and decisions. Let everyone pick an activity and/or food they want to explore while on vacation. Even if you choose to stay somewhere with your own kitchen, try to switch things up a bit so it doesn't feel so routine. If you choose to cook your own food, try exploring some of the local foods and trying your hand at making new meals and having the family help. Do scavenger hunts at the local grocery store if they have unique things that you do not often see at home. You can also explore food tours and local cooking classes. Many have options for families. If you are really into hikes or parks (state/national), pick a few special ones to check out. Take a break from electronics - but in a way that is fun for everyone. Find new games everyone enjoys. Or, use the technology but in new ways. Write a song together. Do a silly TikTok challenge as a family. Learn some dance move and then have a dance off. The key here isn't to spend a fortune on being overly busy doing all the things. It's to make memories and to get out of the routine.

Your Vacation Spot Feels Like a Second Job

The Vibe: Do you have a time share, a cabin or second home, or maybe a favorite AirBNB that you often frequent? Time spent here is always enjoyable, it's familiar, it's nostalgic, and you can't imagine not incorporating it into your annual plans. However, once you get there, you must fully stock the kitchen, you must bring/buy certain supplies, you must clean up after yourself - sometimes even by washing bedding and dishes prior to leaving. Or maybe it's a destination that you love but it's not a great fit for all members of your family so you end up spending more of your time ensuring everyone else is comfortable instead of finding time to also do the things you love. Or, maybe you go camping because your kids like to go camping when in reality, you really dislike it. It's so much work to set up the campsite, make meals, stay warm and dry, and so you don't really leave feeling refreshed.

The Pivot: Don't give up on the vacation, it's just time to switch things up a bit. If you have a time share or cabin, plan ahead of time to figure out creative ways to prioritize your party's relaxation. If you don't want to wake up at 5 AM the day you leave to wash bedding, clean up, do dishes, and then pack up, think about alternatives. Bring your own sheets, blankets and pillows. You can make up the beds with these when you get there and just swap it out with the typical bedding when you leave. You can bring the dirty sheets home with you and take care of it once you are home. Bring paper or recyclable plates, cutlery, serving trays, and cups. You can use these and throw away/recycle/bring home as needed. If you have some extra cash, plan to pay a cleaning service to come in after you leave to do all of that work for you. Do some research and find something within driving distance to explore that you have never seen before. If none of those things sound helpful, you can also switch up your location. If you found yourself in the camping situation above, explore glamping. There are some pretty amazing experiences in treehouses, yurts, elevated tents - all with running water and a functioning kitchen!

The secret to travel therapy isn't just booking a ticket - it's matching the vibe of the trip to whatever your brain is currently starving for. Life is always going to have its loud, beautifully chaotic moments, but a well-timed, properly planned detour is the ultimate way to reset your compass.

What travel vibe is your soul craving right now? Are you due for a quiet solo escape, or is it time to round up the circus for a group trip? Drop a comment below and let's talk about it!